Temptation of Death

Will I be better off if I am dead ?
Will you finally see me,
Even if its only in your dreams...
Will my words be finally heard,
and not fall on deaf ears ?
Oh please tell me,
if I am not here,
will you care for me more ?
And yearn for my presence,
like a thirsty stork waiting for rain..
Oh please tell me,
Will I be better off if I am dead ?
And you finally accept me,
Just the way I am !!!

Dear diary !!

Lies, hurt, cowardice,
Deception personified,
a monument to treachery,
I am stuck up with you
An albatross around my neck !!


Empty words.
scattered like sand in the wind.
You are no different,
Not your fault,
You all are the same.


Broken promises,
Shattered dreams,
Reverberate along the walls of my mind.
You are forgiven...
I can finally hate you !

Life goes on

We should have stayed together,
That was our destiny,
But it wasn't meant to be...

Lost,
And found,
And lost again...
I moved on,
But you are still stuck there
Maybe still waiting for me.

When will you understand,
Eternity is a void,
Full of grief
And despair,
Which slowly weakens our will to survive.

We get hurt,
And then heal.
We learn to smile inspite of our tears,
And life goes on...

We were meant to be together,
But it didn't work out.
Life still goes on!

Remembrance

I thought of you again,
remembering the times we spent together.
That smile,
that grin,
Musical like the stream,
that flows in the distant greens.

That twinkle in your eyes,
the mischievous wink,
that innocent look on your face,
when your mind was full of pranks
awaiting the unawares..

The remembrance lingers on,
of how I had tried to hold on to you.
Oh ! I had tried real hard,
But then who can hold sand in his hands...

Letting go was painful,
but it wasn't sad,
you were my swan song,
I don't feel remorse,
I still love you..

Charade

Behind the veils,
I conceal my wounds
and try to gather my thoughts.

The sheathe can break,
The veneer is very thin.
I'll be hurt again..

I am sore,
my soul is scorched
but you are so shallow..
Oh! why don't you care ??
You carry on your charade
happy in your makebelieve world,
unwittingly hurting me again
and again..

Till there is nothing more left.
Till I succumb to despair
And sink,
lost,
In the abyss of hopelessness...

Identity..

A sinner but a healer,
loser but still a winner,
coherent but confused thoughts,
stirred but inert,
atheist but a preacher,
a queen but still poor,
a beggar but still content,
black and white but still grey...
An enigma,
a question,
or my identity...

This Sinking Feeling !!!

Pain ,
sorrow ,
hopelessness,
Painting the river black.

Lunacy,
Apathy,
Bewilderment ,
At the end of the bottomless pit.

Anger,
Jealousy,
Frustration,
Dark as the colour green.

Faith,
Wishes,
Identity,
Lost in this melee of repentant grief.

Soaked,
but thirsty,
Still waiting for release.

Stuck in a quagmire,
Slowly being sucked
into the black hole of anonymity....